Waiting for the Mud to Settle

“Do you have the patience to wait till your mud settles and the water is clear? Can you remain unmoving until the right action arises by itself?” Lao-Tsu

I’ve been holding this quote dear whilst traveling between countries ... trains, planes and automobiles. While I tend to do lots of my best thinking and dreaming in this space of moving betwix and between, it can also stir up lots of unsettled emotions ... doubts and worries. 

It highlights a common experience when one takes on a practice of self-awareness. By turning the spot light on yourself, watching the activities of your mind moment to moment, it means that you do become more aware! No longer numbed, or operating underneath awareness, the emotions jump out and say “hey I’m here right now!” When these happen to be negative emotions, it can feel uncomfortable to say the least.

However, the other side of these practices teaches us that challenging emotions will rise up, that doubts and worries are a normal part of being human. They will come, so we don’t need to beat ourselves up when they do. Further, if we can remain present by continually observing, without attaching to, following or reacting from these emotions, then they will move through.

I find it is a continuous practice, and I do not stop learning about myself. The key is to keep watching and noticing, paying careful attention to what is arising in body and mind. When I find I am in the midst of some kind of emotion turmoil, I know that I am clouded. I know the mud hasn’t yet settled but it will in time. It reminds me to simply pause and wait, for once the waters have cleared the next step will arise. This is not something I need to figure out, but I can trust in a deeper wisdom to emerge.